Punch Up: “To Me My ❌-Men”

Chapter Thirteen:

January, 1984, Defenders No. 130 by Zeck, Cirocco, DeMulder, Scheele, J. Chiang, DeMatteis + Potts & Nocenti

February, 1984, Defenders No. 131 by

Mixtape track: Panama by Van Halen; &

Chapter 13 of “to me my ❌-Men,” where we check in with Hank, Warren, and Bobby, as they prep for their regular pool party scene.

Previously on “to me my ❌-Men,”

While we left off the main plot amongst the Morlocks, with a relatively happy ending to Kitty and Caliban, we are bringing here with a catch up on Candy and Warren. Candy had previously been spending her time white Warren when he is not being crucified in preparation for his own forced betrothal to a Morlock, or bleeding out on a motel rug with Dazzler. Candy had her own little adventure with another lady and Kurt and a bathtub.

The cover reveals Valkyrie. Whom we all know, but is making her first appearance in this seemingly random telling of the -Men.

“And In The End!” begins with two Defenders/Avengers Valkyrie and Moondragon holding on to a rocket that is on takeoff, because the Defenders does comics the right way!

Oh we are in Nor Cal. So this happened near by when I was 9.

The layouts by Zeck are reminiscent of Neal Adams early 70’s X-Men. It pure octane, by angles. They trying to overt world war three. Very 1984. This was our reality constantly.

Marvel really fails us with folks doing villainy, in part because of costume design, and also because motivations.

Two of the three original X-Men we love, who are all on the Defenders, are joined by fellow roommate/superhero Gargoyle. The two with wings my to save their falling housemates.

The third X-Men sets up an ice shoot. Hank is at the bottom to catch them. So now we know that Bobby, Warren, and Hank still hang. Great news.

The five cohabitants are joined by two other super women, Seraph and Cloud. Best guess is Moondragon, Valkyrie, and Iceman didn’t provide enough sexual innuendoes.

Villainy v roommates fight…but it’s really quick and nearly painless, despite villainy not having a decent tailor. The art is actually excellent.

Haha, Nick Fury and SHIELD are to late.

There is a bunch of espionage chatter, because definitely some double agents are present…and it’s the Cold War.

The roommate don’t exactly trust each other…been there.

And so they head to…oh right…they don’t live at the Walker’s anymore (see Defenders when it was excellent!)…the Rocky Mountain estate of WWIII in New Mexico.

WHAT?! That’s Angel’s initials.

Oh that was an Avengers Quinn jet they totaled. Oops.

Oh and the reference the thankful defunct Champions.

Warren thinks Hank is right, that the Defender are a darn good team. Oh buddy, Hanks rarely right! Also, you are not a team. These are your housemates.

Candy is there and an even dumber villainy is afoot.

Fight fight!

Damn, Moondragon just destroyed his mind.

Awkward

Candy is at her drafting table.

They make out. Some minor drama.

And the essential Beast jumping in the pool, smiling ending. Well, not Moondragon, cause drama.

This Beast, Iceman, Angel in this specific pool…that is the reason for this issue. It sets a scene, that will pay off.

So now we are have caught up with the original remaining ❌-Men.