Punch Up: “To Me My ❌-Men”

Chapter Fourteen:

1984

March & April, 1984, Uncanny X-Men 182 & 183 by Romita Jr, Green, Wein, Orzechowski, Claremont +Louise, Necenti & Sanderson

Mixtape tracks: You Might Think by The Cars & Tell Me by Corrosion of Conformity

Chapter 14 of “to me my ❌-Men,” where spoiler if you are not reading along, as there are live reactions, we get into with the Carol, Rogue, Mystique, Destiny drama and the Logan, Peter, Kitty, Ilyana, and DOUG drama. Ororo and Kurt are doing their best. The Hellfire Club and SHIELD are involved. We are in it now!

Previously on “to me my ❌-Men,” we have been playing the 20th Century game of single issue spinner rack, flee market, yard sale, and used book store randomness, but have also experienced our second Marvel Limited Series thanks to the late 20th Century convenience of the Local Comic Book Shop, and their back issue bins. So we actually witnessed what the heck happened to Illyana regarding her aging process. And boy are we sorry we asked. SPOILERS

Rogue is front and center here and she is very officially an ❌-Men, and her southern dialect is front and centered. She also has her iconic mid-80’s style going for her. She sores!

She is pulling that classic superhero fly by move, of mid-air encounter with a passenger jet.

She then lands, having traveled half the planet, into an attic bedroom in the School for Gifted Youngsters. One we are familiar with.

She is contemplative, internalised binary good v evil labeling is part of her labeling vocabulary, as she refers to herself as once evil and now a good guy.

In the same thought she credits Mystique as Mom. And since it is an adaptive situation, she is not under much obligation to bestow her the honour, but does so as simply a fact.

She then makes the audacious note that she is one of the goood guys, because X-Men.

Why!?

Because they can video conference with Reed Richards and Captain America?

Chuck is every day doing villainy! Is not grooming through telepathy and economic privilege of children annexed from their parents, and then training and disseminating them into actions of war not?!

I mean Rogue could be at home with her Moms, HER WORDS, but nah…she thinks them evil, because society labels it so.

Rogue knows she will have a choice to make. Family v Friends. Why!?

“Place is awful quiet…”

In that “home” beware.

Rogue references an it’s a ‘Tuesday,’ space dragon battle, that she didn’t attend, as she was babysitting the X-Babies (until actual X-Babies, might lean into this).

Apparently she just noticed the alarm that’s been ringing. It’s a message from Maddy (Madelyne Pryor, Scott’s newlywed), something about him disappearing out of her arms. I LOVE Rogue’s reaction, because this is mine. “he got grabbed girl, like we all did - - …Yanked across the universe by …’he shall not be named.” Yup…we are avoiding this sort of crossover event comic, as best we can. - Ben

Second message is from Michael Rossi, for Chuck. He is on SHIELD Hellicarrier. Spying there in concert with Chuck. He gets cut off or taken. Rogue is off.

Oh but there is a third message…it’s Illyana, about Kitty being kidnapped again. Being Kidnapped is Kitty’s life.

This time Hellfire Club, White Queen recruitment is a bit more direct than Chucks. The X-Babies are all out there trying to save her. They left a note. Yes, if they are gone they…well they are already living that kidnapped life.

I can see why Disney and Fox struggled to appropriately tell this story. But in light of our political climate and the subject of human trafficking, sexual abuse, and identity…I feel like this story should be told with the vibes we are starting to get here.

Oh…best part of the message…so GenXer…”If you (Chuck) never come back then it really doesn’t matter” CLICK!

The note: ‘Prof, Kitty accompanied her friend, Doug, to Mass, to see if Emma is in a coma. She was wrong.’

Agents are interrogating Micheal on the Hellecarrier.

One of the Agents is having Fury be notified. The other is reporting to Shaw, who is with Tessa in the Hellfire Club. Emma astral telepathy reports in that she has the X-Babies. You see…everyone is compromised in this universe.

Rogue bust in on SHIELD.

Oh just noticed we are being heavily advertised to: Atari, Oreo/Free Spidy Comic, Cookie-Crisp/Hulk and free Alpha Flight/FF/Spidy/X-Men comics, Atari/Pac-Man/Centipede/Donkey Kong/Dig Doug…, Epic Illustrated/ Power Pack on sale May 1 DON’T MISS IT!!

Rogue kicks the door down with her sick impractical healed boots and iconic black leggings. Get use to that. Not a leg or foot guy…but it looks cool to me.

Remember the last time we saw Nick, and how he was late to save the day after a bunch of roommates did in Nor Cal, before going to a pool party in New Mexico?! Well Rogue is thinking, “Your people haven’t changed, Nick Fury - - They’re brave but oh - so - Dumb.” See how if you reading X-Men it was hard to take much else in Marvel seriously in the 80’s?

Agent Paul is pulling competent moves. He of course works for the Hellfire Club too.

He sets up his fellow interrogator Agent Price. Gets the drop on him too.

Sorry Paul, as cool as you looked a couple panels ago…you’re still a hench!

Colonel Micky is saved!

He he is messed up bad, but recognizes Rogue’s voice. The escape has some action, but like escaping a Deathstar they make it.

Safe house in Cape Cod…oh it’s Mystique and Destiny’s place. Ideal spot.

Oh…Micky was her first love, and she makes a verbal joke about caring him across the threshold. In another life this could have been.

He is supposed to be dead as of years ago.

Wait! He wakes, only knows her by reputation from Chuck. He knows she is from the Deep South…but is talking about her Boston accent…he and I are confused. And he recognizes her voice but doesn’t know her?! Mystique?!…oh no I totally get it! This is so cool!

Just before reading this issue I wanted to check something and confirmed what I experienced in the 80’s…and frankly is why my pal Kelly’s Carol run (Vol 11!!) is so fun for us in grappling with all this four+ decades later. Claremont introduces Mystique, Destiny, Rogue, and with Carol, wrote them into this mess through minimally two titles, non of which are X-titles or spinoffs. And then explains it over a decade later in a third. Yet it is central to Rogue’s story, Carol’s story, Mystique’s story, and Destiny’s story in decades of X-titles, spinoffs and Carol’s own multiple titles comic series through I guess a dozen volumes. All because this is how we are introduced to Rogue.

Avengers by Claremont & Golden

A page I have not looked at till this morning.

That’s Jessica Drew and Carol (Jane Doe) in SF in 1981. My home at the time is directly due East across the water and up the street. These are elements that are central to the story (well not my house).

But I was and honestly am, confused by all this. I didn’t fully contextually understand how horrible and violating what Rogue did. I was a dumb kid…and Claremont through telling this story in a way that avoided sequencing…that was not sequential…the format being randomized titles…in a market place designed for randomized consumption…and our own agency to select our own continuity…and our economic access being what it was…well it almost seems purposeful. Like we are solving our own choose your own adventure mystery.

And as I have said before there is Jewishness in comics and comics culture. The Talmudic debate is part of our Geek culture. Claremont is Jewish. I am Jewish. I am reading this and speaking of it as my ancestry might and keeping it alive as instructed through this cultural trash.

So here we are having heard references to an event…and even through accessing the information age, we are still explorers equitable in telling of this reading. Why does Micheal recognise her voice and not know her? Why does she consider him her first love? Well I suspect in this moment, we have clues to what is happening in part…and Mystique is bait for the wrong path.

Ok so Rogue serves him soup and now he is arguing it is his friends special soup and she is like yeah, that’s me…and he is like…no! You are not my friend. I don’t know you.

This page is rad!

Damn! She is calling him Rossi, and he is like why you using my special nick name and she is like, I gave it you..and he is like…nah!

Now they are talking about the first time they met and how he and Logan busted her out of KGB prison…and that they had been friends since the Air Force training and they have know each there for eight years when she was 18…and that’s when Rogue realizes…wait…

I’m 18 now.

See what year and age does matter. And also, SHE-HULK IS A GREAT COMIC FOR FIGURING THIS ONE OUT!

This isn’t Mystique and Destiny’s house.

It’s Carol’s parents house! She is thinking she is Carol!

She runs, trips….damn down a hillside.

A flashback to SF and the moment. No Jessica Drew.

She is realising she will do the same to him potentially that she did to Carol. She is horrified in the discovery that she is the monster.

Micky: “So what happens to Carol?” Rogue: “Ah’m Carol - - In all the ways that count!” Damn he bitch slaps her. This is complicated AF (and we knew this…it still hits).

Micky: “I wish I had the power to kill you.” Rogue: “…so do I.”

Epilogue: Valentina (*Thunderbolts) & Nick think Rogue killed Price…they really are dumb.

Our second issues cover has Cain and Piotr in a bar fight with Kurt and Logan watching from the bar.

While we credit everyone and we have highlighted a few thus far, AND we have established some thoughts on the pencilers during this The Claremont Era…I haven’t properly framed equitable co-creator heroes here.

Any time we have (and more often than not in “to me my ❌-Men) you have Chris Claremont writing, Louise Jones Simonson (last issue), and/or Ann Nocenti editing and/or writing, partnered up with Glynis Oliver Wein coloring, Tom Orzechowski lettering, and Dan Green inking…is a time to be content that the penciler has all they need to collaborate on a comic that works.

“A lovely day…” -Piotr

He and Kitty overlooking the water.

Referencing the ❌-Men’s kidnapping by he who shale not be named and how Kitty felt for them (maybe because that is her life!).

Oh I guess she was rescued by the New Mutants between issues. Honestly, it’s fine at this point, best not to dwell. We don’t need to know everything. See everything. The moments have more mystery and punch. It’s fun.

Damn, he says he is in love with someone else. OH THANK YOU JESUS!!! I mean…oh how sad for Kitty. Now she can explore this side of life with Illyana. WHAT I SAY!?!

He’s in love with an alien.

The alien is dead. Died in his arms.

So glad we missed this.

This is better.

It’s over between Kitty and Piotr and it’s because his feeling changed (YESSSS).

Kitty: “Look, I hate to run but I’ve got homework.”

HELLA!

Time check: Kitty has lived in School of Gifted Youngsters for “NEARLY two years.” Kitty moved in summer of 1980, and this is spring of 1984. Yup two years.

Oh Kitty’s a real 80’s kid. Her parents are going through a divorce. Yup, been there.

Oh snap, Kitty: “Ororo’s watching. I guess she knows. Everyone probably knows. Don’t sweat it, Storm, I’m a big girl. I can handle things fine. I’ll make you proud. I’ll be as strong and tough and HEARTLESS as you.”

She dials it back and this is in her head…thought ballon…don’t judge.

“If I fall in love…” while entering the room and looking at Illyana.

Illyana checks in.

Kitty is sarcastic in response.

Lockheed: “kwōōō?”

Keep teen girl bedrooms safe spaces like this.

Also…more silent panels please.

Meanwhile Rogue is in the Danger Room working through it and Ororo tries to council her as she is trying to do death by robot. Rogue: “Just leave me alone.”

Ororo thinks Chuck being with the anew Mutants is unhelpful given how the weekend is going…but honestly I disagree. Ororo you are doing fine.

Logan is giving Piotr no choice in going to the bar and have an old dude to young dude talk.

Kurt teleports into the outing…which is “wonderful.”

Kitty is packing to go back home to Chicago. She will check in on her parents and the divorce. Ororo hugs her goodbye. Nice page layout. Works.

Dallas: Valerie Cooper National Security Council and Raven Darkhölme Deputy Director of Defense (Mystique) are driving from airport…discussing Bob Kelly’s Mutant bill and how it’s a big ta do. Mystique says it’s anti-gov paranoia. Val references Orwell and in the same breath puts fear at the doorstep of Mutants over Nuclear Holocaust. As Raven, Mystique pushes back slightly by saying there is a process because Mutants are born not created.

Val references Raven’s pal Forge as a solution. Mystique internal thoughts are of self and mutant preservation and a plan in the works…as she is literally driving the car with Val in it.

Manhattan; Monaghan’s: Kurt has Peter get the first round, ‘three draft and a whisky for the cowboy’ (I grew up to be Logan). Peter is getting carded. Apparently legal is 18 in NYC in 1984…Peter is 19, so close to 20. Again, Kitty is “not yet 14” four months ago.

Kurt to Peter: “You just a boy.” Well that too!

Logan: “Y’owe Kitty an apology- - an us an explanation.” Piotr: “I fell in love with another - - is that a crime?!” Logan: “What you felt wasn’t love.” *but all of this is a crime.

his statement is a lot…

Logan: “Kitty’s not a kid anymore (SHE ISN’T!?!) - - You two were goin’ beyond playin’ games. You were thinkin’ marriage (Poor stalker Caliban), a life together. At the same time, you suddenly have competition (not Caliban….poor stalker Caliban) - - from Doug Ramsey (when we get to Doug this will become amazing!) - - someone Kitty’s age (FINALLY…also Peter isn’t your sister her same age?!…or she actually just a kid still), as smart as her (don’t do this…life is an education and what is smart even?!) with th’ same upbringing’ an’ interests (Logan is projecting his insecurities and undercuts his life times of wisdom here…burly we are how many drinks in?!…mutant metabolism noted)…

Peter is going with “who are you to talk..”

Logan loves a bar fight.

Logan cuts this off as he smells Cain. But Peter is a messy drunk so the exit plan doesn’t work…as Cain got his beer on his head.

Bar fight…but it’s as the cover implied. Kurt and Logan watch. The women Cain was with has moved on. That was fast.

The bar clears.

Cain pays for the clean up.

Peter is so self righteous, he is calling out Logan for not having his back and just standing there (which Kurt also did…with Logan’s encouragement).

The back and forth results in Logan noting, Peter did not have Kitty’s back. Well written and delicious gotcha!

Peter: “YES!!”

Logan: “like Kitty did for you?”

HELLA!

Logan: “SHE’S 14, PETER. BUT TO SAVE YOU, SHE AGREED TO MARRY CALIBAN AND JOIN THE MORLOCKS (she was kinda a jerk to the Morlocks in this). * IF CALIBAN HADN’T RELEASED HER FROM THE VOW (she negotiated this), SHE’D BE THERE TODAY. YOU NEVER EVEN SAID, ‘THANK YOU.”

Kurt and Logan do a postmortem, as Logan vanquished the boy.

And looking down from above on the rooftop, the women who was with Cain is Selene…and we are very much in the story now!

Next: A Two In One